


Daredevil Shit

by oursisthefury



Series: Marvel Shit [1]
Category: Daredevil (TV)
Genre: Gen, This is pure crack
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-17
Updated: 2016-10-17
Packaged: 2018-08-22 22:18:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8303269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oursisthefury/pseuds/oursisthefury
Summary: Just some random Daredevil crap that me and my sis thought of when we finished it a couple months ago.





	1. Water

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt swims.

Frank pushes Matt into the water. "No! Wait! I can't swim!" Matt cries out, as he begins sinking. "Really? Are you fucking serious?" The Punisher says in anger and disbelief. "...yes." Matt responds quietly. Frank is inconvenienced yet again.


	2. Heelies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heelies are sick, man.

"Matt, Heelies are dangerous enough for people who can actually see but..." Foggy trails off, staring at his friend's new footwear. "But? I'm not made of glass, Foggy." Matt does a sick move with his Heelies. The next day, he's in the hospital. "It... Was... The... Heelies..." He says weakly. Foggy rolls his eyes.


	3. I did something bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karen admits something.

"Matt, I killed someone..." Karen says quietly. "Who?" Matt is stunned. He has never killed anyone. "Um, he was, uh, Fisk's right hand man, I think..." She stutters. "Oh, that guy? Like who cares?" Matt says with a scoff.


	4. Come on, it was a gift!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt gets Frank a present.

"Frank, I got you this." Matt hands Frank a present. "Thanks..." Frank unwraps it to find a book. The title reads "How to control your anger in five easy steps". He looks up at Matt and says, "Fuck you, Red." Not the answer Matt was expecting.


	5. Ouch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wesley is mean.

Wesley is typing away at something on his laptop. Fisk is curious. He wanders over to see what Wesley is doing. "What're you writing?" He questions. Wesley jumps and covers the computer screen. "N-nothing!" He yelps. "C'mon, let me see." Fisk pries the device from Wesley's hands and looks at the screen. It is an email. An email to Frank Castle. And it reads, "So this is the fourth time I've emailed you, but I'd like to work with you. You're a lot cooler than my current boss. LOL." Fisk is stunned and hurt. 

Frank Castle is looking at his inbox on his email. There are a bunch of emails from a person called 'Wesley'. He does not know a Wesley. He moves the emails to trash.


	6. Let's break up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fisk and Matt break up.

"Daredevil, I think we should see other people." Fisk announces. "I'm already seeing Frank so yeah." His enemy replies, sounding bored. "Well, um, me too." Fisk blurts out. "We can't share him. He's mine." Daredevil huffs. "I don't belong to either of you!" Frank snaps, he has been in the background the whole time.


	7. Canes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt has so many canes.

"How many canes do you have?" Foggy questions. "Many." Matt answers pulling multitudes from his closet. He keeps pulling and pulling, "Enough! Matt, stop!" His friend cries as he is buried alive. Matt does not hear him.


	8. Canes, part 2.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Littering is a sin, Matt!

A newspaper headline bears the words "Mysterious canes found in various alleyways all over the city!" Foggy buys one and reads it to Matt. "Man, is this you?" Matt nods. "You gotta pick those things back up, Matt. That's littering." Foggy says. Matt agrees, littering is a sin.


	9. What? I'm broke.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karen just wants Frank to be happy.

Karen wants to make Frank happy. In one of their hospital conversations, he lets it slip that he is fond of dogs. Karen does not have a dog nor do her friends. She does not have the money right now to purchase one either. She considers her options. Matt, in his costume, hears a scream echo into the night, he gets there quickly, an old woman is distraught, someone has stolen her dog. Karen dashes away with a small poodle in her arms, practically throwing herself into her car. Matt doesn't know what to do. The next day, Karen puts the dog on Frank's bed. He looks perplexed, she leaves and Matt walks in. Matt takes the dog from him. Frank is upset.


	10. Are you even blind?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is Matt really blind? Foggy wants to know.

"Are you even blind?!" Foggy demands angrily. Matt needs to prove a point. He gets up and walks right into one of his walls. This hurts. "That proves nothing, Matt." Foggy snaps. Matt is disappointed.


	11. People are cruel.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fisk gets his feelings hurt.

Fisk overhears one of his own squad members calling him fat and ugly. A single tear rolls down his cheek.


	12. Matt just keeps falling.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt falls down numerous flights of stairs everyday.

Matt says that he's "fallen" down stairs a lot and that's why he's so beat up. Foggy shakes his head. "Geeze, Matt. Be careful." He scolds.


	13. Who, like, even is anyone?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who knows?

"Who is that?" Karen asks, pointing to Electra in Matt's bed. "My sister." Matt replies without skipping a beat. "Then who's that?" Karen points to Stick. Matt shrugs. "Who, like, even knows anymore?"


	14. Betcha wish you could see.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt needs help.

"MATT! The open manhole!" Karen and Foggy scream at their blind friend. Matt doesn't hear them. He takes one step and is gone into the gaping abyss.


	15. Why's there ice?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt is an idiot.

"I don't need your help, bitch." Matt takes one step, slips on ice and falls flat on his face. Frank stares.


	16. An awkward date.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karen, no!

Karen is on a date with Matt. So far there is awkward silence. "So did you see the movie that was playing on TV last night?" She asks, trying to make conversation. Matt makes no reply. He has no TV. He can't see. Karen regrets.


	17. How convincing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt, how are you a lawyer?

"You shouldn't kill people, Frank." Matt says. "Why not?" Frank asks. "Because, uh, it's not nice," Matt fumbles. Frank is unconvinced.


	18. It could've been worse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt, you really should be better at this sort of thing!

Frank finishes his sad, tragic story. Matt wants to say something comforting. He places his hand firmly on Frank's shoulder, "It could've been worse." He says. Frank looks up at him in shock. Matt flees the scene.


	19. Poor execution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Frank is himself and that causes problems.

Frank's trial is going poorly. "You guys suck." Frank states. "We're.. we're trying our best." Foggy replies weakly. He breaks down sobbing. Karen glares at Frank. "Look what you did." She growls. Frank states at Matt for help. But Matt does not notice.


	20. Red?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Matt, please.

"Your voice sounds familiar..." Frank trails off, staring at Matt. "Red?" Matt feels sweat drip down his face. "Oh, like my red glasses?" He laughs. And he keeps laughing. And laughing. And laughing. Foggy, Karen, and Frank are unnerved. Matt finally passes out. "Wtf?" Foggy asks.


	21. Froggy Nelson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I got my mom to watch Daredevil, she told me that she secretly calls Foggy "Froggy" in her head.

"I'm Matt, and this is my friend, Froggy." Matt is introducing Foggy to a hot girl that he met, and Foggy is interested in her. "Froggy?" The girl asks with a giggle. "No, it's actually Foggy." Foggy corrects her and gives Matt a look. "Sorry, Froggy." Matt apologizes but he doesn't understand how the name 'Foggy' is any better than the name 'Froggy'. "Matt, you literally just called me 'Froggy' again." Foggy snaps irritated. The hot girl slips away while they are arguing.


End file.
